Fantasy Golf: AT&T Pebble Beach Pro-Am Preview

Before we get to the golf, please allow me a few comments on the Ravens and, more particularly, many of my fellow fans who have been inclined to blame the loss on everything from the officiating to Travis Kelce being a big meany to Justin Tucker before the game. My polite request to them would be to please shut the fuck up. 

The Ravens got their asses kicked across the board and it started days before kickoff with whatever absurd offensive game plan called for them to hand the ball to their running backs six times. SIX FUCKING TIMES!!! They led the damn league in rushing yards (again) and the Chiefs were barely middle of the pack in rushing defense. Yet there they were applying the one strategy that has almost guaranteed their playoff exit by throwing it more than twice as many times as they run it. Complete premeditated jackassery.  

As for the refs, here's an idea. Don't commit two obvious unsportsmanlike penalties right in front of them and club the other team's quarterback in the face with your fist. Take those three away, and the penalty yards are Ravens - 5 for 50 and Chiefs - 3 for 30. Hardly grounds for a conspiracy theory . . . even by today's standards.

And finally we have the bitch ass response to Kelce throwing Tucker's helmet out of the way. Here's the video of this crime against humanity. I can tell you for a fact that if the opposing kicker left his shit on the ground where my quarterback was warming-up, he'd need an usher to return it from the 7th row. And let's be honest about Tucker. He is both the greatest kicker in NFL history and a smirking dweeb. He put his helmet down on the field to stretch an hour before the game and he's a kicker for chrissakes. The fact that his is the only one out there tells you everything you need to know. Grow up. 

Let's talk some fucking golf.  

TWEET OF THE WEEK

Ben An recently welcomed a slew of questions on Twitter. It's worth a look as his answers were entertaining, enlightening and, in this case, hopefully instructive. Preach Ben . . . preach. 

Ready players. https://t.co/wl5uR4J95g

— Byeong Hun An (@ByeongHunAn) January 28, 2024

GOLF ANALYSIS

The weather in the bay area for this weekend looks like total shit so that has us leaning towards a combination of Pebble Beach all-stars and British Open type players. As to the former, we refer to this bonus tweet from golf stat guru Justin Ray which confirmed half of my picks after I'd already made them. I swear. 

Most birdies/eagles per round at Pebble Beach + Spyglass, at Pebble Pro-Am, among players in field since 2017 (min. 8 rounds played)

Denny McCarthy, 5.00
Jason Day, 4.95
Tom Hoge, 4.55
Jordan Spieth, 4.55
Max Homa, 4.50

— Justin Ray (@JustinRayGolf) January 30, 2024

In my somewhat experienced and casually researched opinion, this week's overall pick comes down to one of the guys on that list not named Tom Hoge (who I still like but not as the lead dog). The historic fragility of Jason Day combined with the forecast may cause one to shy away from him but don't be fooled. He is not afraid to tussle with Mother Nature as evidenced by his track record here and the British Open along with the fact that he won his lone major at Whistling Straits. Of all things that will lead him to withdraw, apparently the weather isn't one of them.

The safest picks are probably Homa and McCarthy. At least one, if not both of them should land you a top ten. And you know what you're getting with Spieth. Buyer beware but also buyer buckle-up and be ready to enjoy the ride of your life.

And we've officially reached the point where you almost have to include a couple members of the Nordic invasion. Eventually the age of the Vikings will come to a close and this poignant moment from Jack Handey will be realized but, for now, they are forming at the border and appear ready to plunder. This weeks horned helmets go to Viktor Hovland and Ludvig Aberg (big week for helmets around here).   

One and Done Pick: Jason Day

The man ain't afraid
to rock a rain suit.

Other Guy I'd Pick: Denny McCarthy

Sleeper Pick: Tom Hoge

DraftKings Top Ten Values

Viktor Hovland	$10,200
Jordan Spieth	$9,400
Max Homa	$9,200
Ludvig Aberg	$9,000
Jason Day	$8,400
Matt Fitzpatrick	$8,200
Justin Rose	$7,500
Denny McCarthy	$7,500
Nick Taylor	$7,200
Tom Hoge	$6,700

With the recent news that Tyrrell Hatton is defecting, we lose yet another reason to watch golf. Those reasons continue to dwindle at a rate that may soon not be sustainable for the PGA Tour but I'm sure Jay Monahan has it all under control. He has my full confidence.

                              THE TYRRELL HATTON MEMORIAL CLUB TOSS

                                       HISTORICAL PERFORMANCE CHART

The glut of DNP's has to be an indication of how annoying this tournament is for most of the pros and how it took making it a signature event to get the best ones to come play with a bunch of "B" list celebrities and sandbagging CEO's. I almost included the results from the 2019 U.S. Open here but all that would have told you is that Rosey finished T3, Rory finished T9 and Spieth finished T65. Brooks Koepka, Jon Rahm and Louis Oosthuizen all finished inn the top ten but they're not here this week because golf sucks right now. 

	DK Price	2023	2022	2021	2020	2019
Rory McIlroy	$11,500	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
Scottie Scheffler	$11,400	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
Viktor Hovland	$10,200	T13	DNP	DNP	T38	DNP
Xander Schauffele	$10,000	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
Patrick Cantlay	$9,700	DNP	T4	T3	T11	DNP
Justin Thomas	$9,600	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
Jordan Spieth	$9,400	T63	2nd	T3	T9	T45
Max Homa	$9,200	DNP	DNP	T7	T14	T10
Collin Morikawa	$9,100	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
Ludvig Aberg	$9,000	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
Sam Burns	$8,900	DNP	DNP	T39	DNP	DNP
Tony Finau	$8,800	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	T38
Cameron Young	$8,700	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
Tommy Fleetwood	$8,600	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	T45
Sungjae Im	$8,500	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	MC
Jason Day	$8,400	DNP	T24	T7	4th	T4
Hideki Matsuyama	$8,300	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
Matt Fitzpatrick	$8,200	MC	T6	DNP	T60	MC
Nicolai Hojgaard	$8,100	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
Byeong Hun An	$8,000	T37	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
Tom Kim	$8,000	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
J.T. Poston	$7,900	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
Sahith Theegala	$7,900	DNP	T65	DNP	DNP	DNP
Beau Hossler	$7,800	T11	3rd	T47	T38	MC
Russell Henley	$7,800	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	MC
Corey Conners	$7,700	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	MC
Keegan Bradley	$7,700	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
Adam Scott	$7,600	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	T61
Brian Harman	$7,600	DNP	MC	T39	DNP	DNP
Chris Kirk	$7,500	DNP	MC	T16	MC	DNP
Denny McCarthy	$7,500	T4	T12	MC	DNP	DNP
Justin Rose	$7,500	1st	62nd	DNP	DNP	DNP
Rickie Fowler	$7,400	DNP	DNP	MC	DNP	DNP
Si Woo Kim	$7,400	DNP	DNP	MC	MC	T4
Wyndham Clark	$7,400	DNP	T65	DNP	T18	T61
Adam Hadwin	$7,300	DNP	T16	DNP	MC	T18
Eric Cole	$7,300	T15	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
Alex Noren	$7,200	DNP	DNP	MC	T32	DNP
Kevin Yu	$7,200	T7	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
Nick Taylor	$7,200	T20	T14	T39	1st	T28
Stephan Jaeger	$7,200	DNP	MC	DNP	DNP	MC
Harris English	$7,100	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
Keith Mitchell	$7,100	T4	T12	MC	T32	MC
Matthieu Pavon	$7,100	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
Brendon Todd	$7,000	T2	T16	DNP	DNP	MC
Erik Van Rooyen	$7,000	MC	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
Sepp Straka	$7,000	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	MC
C. Bezuidenhout	$6,900	DNP	T14	DNP	DNP	DNP
Nick Dunlap	$6,900	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
Patrick Rodgers	$6,900	DNP	MC	MC	MC	MC
Andrew Putnam	$6,800	MC	T6	T55	DNP	T38
Emilliano Grillo	$6,800	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
Taylor Montgomery	$6,800	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
Cam Davis	$6,700	DNP	DNP	T14	T38	T59
Tom Hoge	$6,700	T48	1st	12th	T60	MC
Adam Svensson	$6,600	DNP	T49	DNP	DNP	MC
Kurt Kitayama	$6,600	T29	MC	DNP	T18	DNP
Thomas Detry	$6,600	T37	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
Lucas Glover	$6,500	MC	MC	DNP	T50	T7
Luke List	$6,500	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
Ben Griffin	$6,400	MC	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
Mackenzie Hughes	$6,400	DNP	T16	DNP	MC	MC
Taylor Moore	$6,400	T15	T16	DNP	DNP	DNP
Nick Hardy	$6,300	T41	MC	DNP	DNP	DNP
Matt Kuchar	$6,200	MC	MC	DNP	T38	T22
Maverick McNealy	$6,200	W/D	T33	2nd	T5	DNP
Webb Simpson	$6,100	MC	DNP	DNP	DNP	DNP
Peter Malnati	$6,000	T4	T42	MC	T11	MC
Seamus Power	$6,000	T15	T9	MC	T38	DNP

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