Wednesday, July 29, 2020

Fantasy Golf: FedEx St. Jude Invitational

If you find yourself becoming bored with the pandemic and want to feel normal compared to some of your fellow citizens, I would highly recommend joining a Facebook group for parents of incoming freshmen at a relatively large university located in a city that has been a COVID-19 hot spot from day one. Here are actual examples along with the answers that I'm not allowed to post as part of an informal plea agreement I made about being easier to get along with or something:

  • Does anyone know of a local company that does charcuterie boxes for pickup and/or delivery? (Have you considered just having it flown in from Marseille?)
  • This is probably a stupid question . . . (then don't ask it)
  • Does anyone know what I can send locally to my daughter for her birthday on Monday? (Your Facebook password and a bottle of Xanax)
  • Can someone recommend a great place for a facial? (Yes. There's an amazing spa three blocks from campus called "The Tone Deaf Lotus")  
  • Polished off a bottle of Rose’ before posting. I’ll soon be crying and eventually pass-out but for now feeling calm. (Please text me your number so we can hangout during parents' weekend). 
Anyway, this website is supposed to be about golf so let's get on to that. But first, this . . .

TWEET OF THE WEEK

Other contenders for best answer to the following Twitter question were "being bilingual" and "getting free stuff" but this one took the cake.



GOLF ANALYSIS FROM THE RECENTLY CREDIBLE

Last week was almost truly magical as I recommended Tony Finau, Charles Howell, III, Max Homa and Richy Werenski, all of whom tied for 3rd. Those picks were buttressed (I have all the best words) by Harris English and Dylan Frittelli (T18), Pat Perez (T23), Patrick Rodgers (T32) and Stewart Cink (T46). Of course my old nemesis Paul Casey missed the cut just to spite me because I tend to harp on the fact that he can't win despite having top ten in the world talent. Come on Pauly. What's it going to take to light your fire?!?!

We don't need him this week as we have a plethora of great options. I am still not letting go of my belief that Justin Thomas is the best player in the world so I'm all in on him at TPC Southwind. And then I'm backing him up with two of the most reliable guys on Tour in Webb Simpson and Collin Morikawa. I honestly don't know if I've ever felt better about my top three picks (uh oh . . . RUN!!!).

To temper some of that enthusiasm, let's go with the contemptible Patrick Reed in the 4th spot and the mercurial Billy Horschel playing the 5. From there I'm playing it a bit safe with Marc Leishman and Ian Poulter followed by Kevin Kisner because this feels like one of those weeks when Kis gets a hair up his ass and either wins or throws a high finish at us. He is currently the undisputed king of the sneak attack top five and, as someone who's scoring has been fluctuating by ten strokes from round to round lately, I can relate. 

Rafa is probably a mistake because he always seems to underperform on courses where he has performed well in the past which seems impossible but it's true. If you share my lack of confidence, take a look at Chez Reavie or Shane Lowry in that price range instead. 

And then there's Phil with his sparkling past record at TPC Southwind including two runner-up finishes since 2013. I know the course has changed but we're due for Phil to make some noise and a big time tournament with an "A" list field at a place where he's had past success seems like the logical place for him to put it together. Also, there's no cut so we shouldn't be at risk of him fucking around with a new swing or multiple drivers for a couple of days and then jetting-off to California for the PGA Championship. Not saying he won't do that anyway, but at least it's less likely this week.   

It's been a long year for sports fans.
We deserve this in contention on Sunday.
One and Done Pick: Justin Thomas

Other Guy I'd Pick: Webb Simpson

Sleeper Pick: Phil Mickelson

DraftKings Top Ten Values

Justin Thomas
$10,700
Webb Simpson
$9,900
Collin Morikawa
$9,500
Patrick Reed
$8,800
Billy Horschel
$8,500
Marc Leishman
$7,700
Ian Poulter
$7,400
Kevin Kisner
$7,000
Rafa Cabrera-Bello
$6,900
Phil Mickelson
$6,600

It was hard to ignore Rahm, Rory and DeChambeau but you can't pick all of the favorites (unless you're PGATour.com). Taking any of those guys plus Patrick Cantlay and Xander Schauffele wouldn't make you a bad person (well maybe DeChambeau). Koepka and DJ were also tough to pass-up but it feels like they're gearing-up for next week and might just go through the motions in Memphis if they even bother to stick around until Sunday. Remember that all of these pre-2019 results are from the FedEx St. Jude Classic so adjust your calibrations accordingly. 

                  THE DON'T KNOCK DEMON SEX UNTIL YOU'VE TRIED IT
                                HISTORICAL PERFORMANCE CHART


DK PRICE
2019
2018
2017
2016
2015
Jon Rahm
$11,400
7th
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Rory McIlroy
$11,200
T4
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Bryson DeChambeau
$11,000
T48
DNP
MC
DNP
T45
Justin Thomas
$10,700
T12
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Patrick Cantlay
$10,100
T12
DNP
MC
DNP
DNP
Webb Simpson
$9,900
2nd
DNP
DNP
DNP
MC
Xander Schauffele
$9,800
T27
DNP
T52
DNP
DNP
Tyrrell Hatton
$9,700
T43
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Daniel Berger
$9,600
DNP
MC
1st
1st
DNP
Collin Morikawa
$9,500
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Viktor Hovland
$9,400
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Dustin Johnson
$9,300
T20
1st
DNP
5th
W/D
Brooks Koepka
$9,200
1st
T30
T37
T2
T3
Tony Finau
$9,100
T27
MC
DNP
DNP
DNP
Matthew Fitzpatrick
$9,000
T4
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Hideki Matsuyama
$8,900
T43
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Patrick Reed
$8,800
T12
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Tommy Fleetwood
$8,700
T4
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Gary Woodland
$8,600
T55
DNP
DNP
MC
DNP
Billy Horschel
$8,500
T9
T51
T4
DNP
T8
Abraham Ancer
$8,400
DNP
MC
DNP
T18
DNP
Rickie Fowler
$8,300
DNP
DNP
MC
DNP
DNP
Jason Day
$8,200
T40
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Jordan Spieth
$8,100
T12
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Sergio Garcia
$8,000
T40
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Matthew Wolff
$7,900
T24
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Paul Casey
$7,800
T27
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Marc Leishman
$7,700
3rd
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Henrik Stenson
$7,600
T27
T26
DNP
DNP
DNP
Matt Kuchar
$7,600
T43
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Kevin Na
$7,500
T43
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Sungjae Im
$7,500
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Ian Poulter
$7,400
8th
DNP
T31
DNP
DNP
Joaquin Niemann
$7,400
DNP
MC
DNP
DNP
DNP
Corey Connors
$7,300
DNP
68th
DNP
DNP
MC
Scottie Scheffler
$7,300
DNP
T43
DNP
DNP
DNP
Adam Hadwin
$7,200
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Max Homa
$7,200
T61
DNP
MC
DNP
66th
Bubba Watson
$7,100
T9
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Danny Willet
$7,100
T43
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Kevin Kisner
$7,000
T27
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Michael Thompson
$7,000
DNP
DNP
T60
MC
T3
Kevin Streelman
$6,900
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Rafa Cabrera-Bello
$6,900
T12
DNP
T4
DNP
DNP
Christiaan Bez …
$6,800
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Erik Van Rooyen
$6,800
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Louis Oosthuizen
$6,800
T20
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Chez Reavie
$6,700
T27
DNP
T4
DNP
T12
Ryan Palmer
$6,700
DNP
T51
MC
DNP
T22
Brendon Todd
$6,600
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Phil Mickelson
$6,600
57th
DNP
9th
T2
T3
Shane Lowry
$6,600
DNP
T30
DNP
DNP
DNP
Byeon Hun An
$6,500
DNP
MC
DNP
DNP
DNP

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