Earlier this week I was walking through a Target buying my weekly supply of carrots, hummus, gum, M&M's, almonds and coffee creamer (the things that fuel the FGR along with Bud Light and angst) and I found myself making eye contact and saying "hey" to everyone else in the store. And not just a passing "hey" but more like a "hey, it's great to fucking see you fellow human . . . get over here and give me a hug!" This is what it has come to.
It probably helped that I was wearing a red shirt so a couple people asked me where things like the toothpaste and motor oil were. On the third such a occasion I told an elderly man that the vacuum bags were in the far corner of the store just past the cat food but before you get to the dildos. He politely thanked me and moved on. I believe that it's these subtle interactions that will save us.
Hey it's playoff season in golf! Well come on! Can't you feel it?!?! We'll get you all fired-up right after this . . .
TWEET OF THE WEEK
When last I wrote, I was sweating various parts of myself off in the southern United States preparing to abandon my son at college. Five days plus 2,200 miles later and that dream thankfully lives on . . . for now. Others have not been as fortunate and would have been wise to heed the warning of one of the great philosophers of our time . . .
"Everybody has a plan until they get punched in the mouth." - Mike Tyson
GOLF ANALYSIS FOR JACK IS A DULL BOY (UH OH)
A bit of a stumble last week with Brendon Todd but hey, I also gave you Billy Horschel (2nd), Webb Simpson (T3), Harold Varner, III, (T7), Bud Cauley (T15) and Talor Gooch (T25) so hopefully you were able to parlay that into some lunch money. Or a COVID test. Or some ecstasy.
This week we head back to TPC Boston after taking a year off so the PGA Tour could shuffle its schedule to avoid football season. Mission accomplished! The good news is that we have several years of data from this course and a lot of it is promising as the last three winners there were Bryson DeMeatHammer, Justin Thomas and Rory McIlroy. Others with solid track records in the land of the deplorable include Dustin Johnson, Paul Casey and Patrick Reed who continues to thrive in this new fan-less environment to which he was already accustomed.
Bryson is due for another win or at worst a top five so use him if you got him. I'm going to pass on the rest of the favorites and drop down to the next tier for Jason Day, Daniel Berger, Tony Finau and Paul Casey, all of whom are playing well as of late. I will be shocked, shocked I tell you if at least two of them aren't contending on Sunday (with the usual caveat that Casey won't, under any circumstances, win).
Tyrrell Hatton is kind of a safety pick despite him shafting me by missing the cut at the PGA Championship while Billy Horschel and Matthew Wolff are momentum picks. Especially Horschel who finished runner-up last week. Remember that he makes all of his money in random three week stretches and then disappears like the bad guys in Point Break (or were they the "bad guys"?) so you need to jump on him before he goes chasing the 50 year storm . . . Bodhi.
Ben An isn't a true sleeper at $7,300 but he's a solid filler at that price coming-off a T22 and a T12 at the PGA Championship and the WGC-FedEx. And finally we needed a bargain guy because the top ten was a little bloated in the middle this week so let's go with the ultimate super flyer in Pat Perez. Sure he may withdraw again like he did at the Dell Technologies Championship in 2018 and at the Wyndham Championship last week but he had a nice stretch leading-up to that and he finished T6 here in 2017. Not to mention, if you're going to start a golf preview by talking about dildos, you might as well end it by talking about Pat Perez. (We kid because we love Pat Perez).
One and Done Pick: Jason Day
Other Guy I'd Pick: Bryson DeChambeau
Sleeper Pick: Byeong Hun An
Draftkings Top Ten Values
Normally I try to edit this Historical Performance Chart down a bit but this week I seriously considered picking every single one of these 72 guys. You know the isolation is starting to get to you when you stare at Lanto Griffin's name for three minutes and think "Lanto? Maybe? Lanto? I don't know. Lanto? Nah. But wait. Lanto?" And on that note, I'm going to play the dog in backgammon. Line 'em up Charlie!
THE I NEVER WANT TO HEAR THE
FUCKING WORD "BUBBLE" AGAIN
HISTORICAL PERFORMANCE CHART
Email the Fantasy Golf Report at fgr@fantasygolfreport.com.
It probably helped that I was wearing a red shirt so a couple people asked me where things like the toothpaste and motor oil were. On the third such a occasion I told an elderly man that the vacuum bags were in the far corner of the store just past the cat food but before you get to the dildos. He politely thanked me and moved on. I believe that it's these subtle interactions that will save us.
Hey it's playoff season in golf! Well come on! Can't you feel it?!?! We'll get you all fired-up right after this . . .
TWEET OF THE WEEK
When last I wrote, I was sweating various parts of myself off in the southern United States preparing to abandon my son at college. Five days plus 2,200 miles later and that dream thankfully lives on . . . for now. Others have not been as fortunate and would have been wise to heed the warning of one of the great philosophers of our time . . .
"Everybody has a plan until they get punched in the mouth." - Mike Tyson
The Daily Tar Heel isn’t holding back this morning. pic.twitter.com/BZmuhAvMQD— Susan Worley (@TarheelSoup) August 17, 2020
GOLF ANALYSIS FOR JACK IS A DULL BOY (UH OH)
A bit of a stumble last week with Brendon Todd but hey, I also gave you Billy Horschel (2nd), Webb Simpson (T3), Harold Varner, III, (T7), Bud Cauley (T15) and Talor Gooch (T25) so hopefully you were able to parlay that into some lunch money. Or a COVID test. Or some ecstasy.
This week we head back to TPC Boston after taking a year off so the PGA Tour could shuffle its schedule to avoid football season. Mission accomplished! The good news is that we have several years of data from this course and a lot of it is promising as the last three winners there were Bryson DeMeatHammer, Justin Thomas and Rory McIlroy. Others with solid track records in the land of the deplorable include Dustin Johnson, Paul Casey and Patrick Reed who continues to thrive in this new fan-less environment to which he was already accustomed.
Bryson is due for another win or at worst a top five so use him if you got him. I'm going to pass on the rest of the favorites and drop down to the next tier for Jason Day, Daniel Berger, Tony Finau and Paul Casey, all of whom are playing well as of late. I will be shocked, shocked I tell you if at least two of them aren't contending on Sunday (with the usual caveat that Casey won't, under any circumstances, win).
Tyrrell Hatton is kind of a safety pick despite him shafting me by missing the cut at the PGA Championship while Billy Horschel and Matthew Wolff are momentum picks. Especially Horschel who finished runner-up last week. Remember that he makes all of his money in random three week stretches and then disappears like the bad guys in Point Break (or were they the "bad guys"?) so you need to jump on him before he goes chasing the 50 year storm . . . Bodhi.
Ben An isn't a true sleeper at $7,300 but he's a solid filler at that price coming-off a T22 and a T12 at the PGA Championship and the WGC-FedEx. And finally we needed a bargain guy because the top ten was a little bloated in the middle this week so let's go with the ultimate super flyer in Pat Perez. Sure he may withdraw again like he did at the Dell Technologies Championship in 2018 and at the Wyndham Championship last week but he had a nice stretch leading-up to that and he finished T6 here in 2017. Not to mention, if you're going to start a golf preview by talking about dildos, you might as well end it by talking about Pat Perez. (We kid because we love Pat Perez).
 |
| This intolerable human sandbag is probably going to win so we just have to learn to deal with it. |
Other Guy I'd Pick: Bryson DeChambeau
Sleeper Pick: Byeong Hun An
Draftkings Top Ten Values
Bryson DeChambeau
|
$11,100
|
Jason Day
|
$9,300
|
Daniel Berger
|
$8,900
|
Tony Finau
|
$8,800
|
Paul Casey
|
$8,500
|
Tyrrell Hatton
|
$8,000
|
Billy Horschel
|
$7,900
|
Matthew Wolff
|
$7,800
|
Byeong Hun An
|
$7,300
|
Pat Perez
|
$6,400
|
Normally I try to edit this Historical Performance Chart down a bit but this week I seriously considered picking every single one of these 72 guys. You know the isolation is starting to get to you when you stare at Lanto Griffin's name for three minutes and think "Lanto? Maybe? Lanto? I don't know. Lanto? Nah. But wait. Lanto?" And on that note, I'm going to play the dog in backgammon. Line 'em up Charlie!
THE I NEVER WANT TO HEAR THE
FUCKING WORD "BUBBLE" AGAIN
HISTORICAL PERFORMANCE CHART
DK Price
|
2018
|
2017
|
2016
|
2015
|
2014
|
|
Justin Thomas
|
$11,300
|
T24
|
1st
|
MC
|
T56
|
DNP
|
B. DeChambeau
|
$11,100
|
1st
|
T30
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Rory McIlroy
|
$10,800
|
T12
|
MC
|
1st
|
T29
|
T5
|
Dustin Johnson
|
$10,400
|
T7
|
T18
|
T8
|
T44
|
DNP
|
Collin Morikawa
|
$10,200
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Jon Rahm
|
$10,000
|
T43
|
T4
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Xander Schauffele
|
$9,700
|
T49
|
T53
|
DNP
|
T44
|
DNP
|
Webb Simpson
|
$9,500
|
T49
|
T75
|
MC
|
T44
|
T9
|
Jason Day
|
$9,300
|
MC
|
T23
|
T15
|
T12
|
T7
|
Patrick Cantlay
|
$9,200
|
T24
|
T13
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Brooks Koepka
|
$9,100
|
T12
|
T18
|
T57
|
MC
|
DNP
|
Patrick Reed
|
$9,000
|
T35
|
T6
|
T5
|
T4
|
T74
|
Daniel Berger
|
$8,900
|
T35
|
T61
|
T41
|
T12
|
DNP
|
Tony Finau
|
$8,800
|
T4
|
T65
|
T24
|
MC
|
DNP
|
Tiger Woods
|
$8,700
|
T24
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Hideki Matsuyama
|
$8,600
|
T4
|
T23
|
T15
|
T25
|
T57
|
Paul Casey
|
$8,500
|
T21
|
T4
|
2nd
|
W/D
|
DNP
|
Adam Scott
|
$8,400
|
T49
|
MC
|
4th
|
DNP
|
T16
|
Tommy Fleetwood
|
$8,300
|
T24
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Viktor Hovland
|
$8,200
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Matthew Fitzpatrick
|
$8,100
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Scottie Scheffler
|
$8,100
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Justin Rose
|
$8,000
|
2nd
|
T10
|
T57
|
MC
|
DNP
|
Tyrrell Hatton
|
$8,000
|
T12
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Billy Horschel
|
$7,900
|
W/D
|
MC
|
MC
|
72nd
|
T2
|
Rickie Fowler
|
$7,900
|
DNP
|
T13
|
T46
|
1st
|
T23
|
Gary Woodland
|
$7,800
|
T24
|
T18
|
T15
|
T12
|
T29
|
Jordan Spieth
|
$7,800
|
T12
|
2nd
|
T21
|
MC
|
T29
|
Matthew Wolff
|
$7,800
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Abraham Ancer
|
$7,700
|
T7
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Sungjae Im
|
$7,700
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Cameron Champ
|
$7,600
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Harris English
|
$7,600
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
T41
|
T12
|
MC
|
Kevin Kisner
|
$7,600
|
T24
|
T53
|
T46
|
T12
|
DNP
|
Brendon Todd
|
$7,500
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
T44
|
MC
|
Louis Oosthuizen
|
$7,500
|
T31
|
T30
|
T8
|
T12
|
DNP
|
Shane Lowry
|
$7,500
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Doc Redman
|
$7,400
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Harold Varner, III
|
$7,400
|
DNP
|
T47
|
T33
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Marc Leishman
|
$7,400
|
T21
|
3rd
|
T46
|
MC
|
T65
|
Matt Kuchar
|
$7,400
|
T43
|
T56
|
T46
|
T9
|
T29
|
Byeong Hun An
|
$7,300
|
T24
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Phil Mickelson
|
$7,300
|
T12
|
T6
|
MC
|
T65
|
T45
|
Russell Henley
|
$7,300
|
T58
|
T40
|
MC
|
MC
|
T2
|
Ryan Palmer
|
$7,300
|
MC
|
DNP
|
T24
|
T65
|
T16
|
Adam Hadwin
|
$7,200
|
T21
|
T13
|
T46
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Bubba Watson
|
$7,200
|
T7
|
T69
|
MC
|
T29
|
T29
|
Ian Poulter
|
$7,200
|
MC
|
T23
|
DNP
|
T33
|
T23
|
Alex Noren
|
$7,100
|
T43
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Chez Reavie
|
$7,100
|
MC
|
T61
|
MC
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Joel Dahmen
|
$7,100
|
MC
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Ryan Moore
|
$7,100
|
T71
|
W/D
|
T8
|
MC
|
73rd
|
Emiliano Grillo
|
$7,000
|
T7
|
22nd
|
T33
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Max Homa
|
$7,000
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Brandt Snedeker
|
$6,900
|
T31
|
DNP
|
T46
|
T44
|
MC
|
Cameron Smith
|
$6,900
|
3rd
|
MC
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Corey Connors
|
$6,900
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Lucas Glover
|
$6,900
|
DNP
|
T30
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Brendan Steele
|
$6,800
|
MC
|
T56
|
72nd
|
DNP
|
T50
|
Brian Harman
|
$6,800
|
T49
|
T65
|
T24
|
T12
|
T65
|
Kevin Na
|
$6,800
|
MC
|
T6
|
DNP
|
T60
|
MC
|
Zach Johnson
|
$6,800
|
MC
|
T56
|
T57
|
T22
|
T16
|
Charles Howell, III
|
$6,700
|
T58
|
MC
|
T24
|
T56
|
T35
|
Kevin Streelman
|
$6,700
|
MC
|
T35
|
T57
|
T69
|
T26
|
Lanto Griffin
|
$6,700
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Bud Cauley
|
$6,600
|
DNP
|
T47
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Keegan Bradley
|
$6,600
|
T49
|
T35
|
DNP
|
T25
|
T16
|
Charley Hoffman
|
$6,500
|
74th
|
T47
|
MC
|
3rd
|
MC
|
Patrick Rodgers
|
$6,500
|
DNP
|
T73
|
T46
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Richie Werenski
|
$6,500
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Rory Sabbatini
|
$6,500
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
T22
|
DNP
|
Talor Gooch
|
$6,500
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
DNP
|
Pat Perez
|
$6,400
|
W/D
|
T6
|
DNP
|
T29
|
W/D
|
Email the Fantasy Golf Report at fgr@fantasygolfreport.com.
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