Wednesday, October 22, 2014

The FGR Week 8 NFL Picks

Last week's 10-5 shindig partially dislodged the writer's block and inspired some real content which will appear in Friday's edition of the FGR. Today, however, we'll take care of the administrative side and see if we can continue climbing-out of our early season crater.

Who's excited for a Sunday
night shootout? I am.
Denver by 7.5 over San Diego: The Pick - Broncos 
Detroit by 4 over Atlanta: The Pick - Lions
Tampa Bay by 2.5 over Minnesota: The Pick - Bucs
New England by 6.5 over Chicago: The Pick - Bears
Kansas City by 6.5 over St. Louis: The Pick - Chiefs
Seattle by 4.5 at Carolina: The Pick - Seahawks
N.Y. Jets by 3 over Buffalo: The Pick - Bills
Miami by 5.5 at Jacksonville: The Pick - Jags
Houston by 1 at Tennessee: The Pick - Titans
Cincinnati by 1.5 over Baltimore: The Pick - Ravens
Arizona by 2.5 over Philadelphia: The Pick - Eagles
Indianapolis by 3 at Pittsburgh: The Pick - Colts
Cleveland by 7 over Oakland: The Pick - Browns
New Orleans by 1.5 over Green Bay: The Pick - Pack 
Dallas by 9.5 over Washington: The Pick - Redskins

Last Week's Record: 10-5 . . . 
Season Record: 50-54-1.

Email the Fantasy Golf Report at fgr@fantasygolfreport.com.


Sunday, October 19, 2014

The FGR Week 7 NFL Picks

This week's version of the FGR's latest feature, "The Excuse of the Week" is a two day golf junket to New Jersey which wiped-out about 65 hours of potential writing time between the event, the prep and the recovery. The result is another week of low-rent NFL picks, a Philadelphia area Carrabba's* busboy rocking a pretty sweet RLX golf jacket and the staff of the host club shipping a pair of shoes to me that have now spent more time traveling from country clubs to my house via FedEx than they have on my feet. Many of you will recognize this as the classic George Costanza move of leaving something behind to ensure that you will be invited back. (The similarities between George Costanza and myself are really starting to pile-on. Come to think of it, I may have eaten part of a chocolate eclair off the top of a trash can when I was away . . .or maybe it was a fried shrimp).

So here comes another round of dry picks. The only analysis I could manufacture for any of these games was that (a) the Bengals v. Colts match-up kind of feels like a playoff game which is bad news for Andy Dalton and the Bengals and (b) we need to take a breath before we get too carried away about the Browns' resurgence (I'm looking at you Peter King). They've got close wins over the Saints who might actually be terrible and the Titans who actually are terrible. Last week they crushed the Steelers who show all of the signs of a team with a crumbling foundation. The truth is we may not know how good or bad the Browns really are until they go to Cincinnati on November 6th because they have the NFL's version of a three week kiddie coaster ride upcoming against the Jags, Raiders and Bucs. If there is any rhyme, reason, order or logic left in this league, they'll drop one of those games so we can get back to the business of ignoring them.

Nothing says, "we've got things
heading in the right direction" like
being 5.5 underdogs to the Redskins.
Indianapolis by 3 over Cincinnati: The Pick - Colts
Washington by 5.5 over Tennessee: The Pick - Redskins
Chicago by 3 over Miami: The Pick - Bears
Cleveland by 5.5 at Jacksonville: The Pick - Jags
Seattle by 7 at St. Louis: The Pick - Seahawks
Green Bay by 7 over Carolina: The Pick - Packers
Baltimore by 7 over Atlanta: The Pick - Ravens
Buffalo by 5.5 over Minnesota: The Pick - Vikings
Detroit by 3 over New Orleans: The Pick - Saints
San Diego by 4 over Kansas City: The Pick - Chiefs
Dallas by 6.5 over N.Y. Giants: The Pick - Cowboys
Arizona by 3.5 at Oakland: The Pick - Cardinals
Denver by 6.5 over San Francisco: The Pick - Denver
Pittsburgh by 3.5 over Houston: The Pick - Texans

Footnote

* We stopped at a Carrabba's on the drive home to catch the last few innings of the inevitable buzz kill that was the O's-Royals game 4. After dropping an entire pizza and a couple glasses of the finest house Cabernet on top of what had already been a fairly debaucherous couple of days, I left without my jacket while feeling bloated and depressed. At least in that moment, I had to acknowledge the wisdom that Dean Wormer bestowed upon Kent Dorfman . . . "hellooooo."

Email the Fantasy Golf Report at fgr@fantasygolfreport.com.

Thursday, October 16, 2014

The FGR Week 7 Thursday Night Pick

New England by 9.5 over N.Y. Jets: The Pick - Patriots

It's all smiles in New England until
their inevitable January demise.
It's time to stop this ridiculous death/rebirth cycle that we've been projecting onto the Patriots for about the past five years. As long as they have Tom Brady and the rest of the AFC East continues to flounder with the likes of Geno Smith, Kyle Orton and Ryan Tannehill, the Pats will keep winning it before eventually running into a playoff opponent who beats them up (Ravens) or outguns them (Broncos). They continue to be who we thought they were. An 11-5 team in a bad division or the NFL's version of the one-eyed man in the land of the blind. Rex Ryan will have the Jets up but they're only averaging 16 points per game and they've only cracked 20 once. That's not going to cut it. This looks like another Thursday night massacre in the making.  

Last Week's Record: 6-8 . . . Season Record: 40-49-1


Sunday, October 12, 2014

The FGR Week 6 NFL Picks

The following scenario pretty much sums-up the current state of the NFL. At some point as last week's one o'clock games were all in the third quarter, every single FGR pick except one was either covering or, in the case of the Steelers (playing the hapless Jags), on their way to covering. The one outlier was the Browns who were getting manhandled by the Titans, arguably the worst team in football. This prompted me to say out loud, "serves me right for missing a shot at running the table because I picked the freakin' Browns." What happened next proves that the NFL has overshot parity and reached a point where we have the Seahawks at the top, the Raiders, Jaguars and Titans at the bottom and in the middle there are twenty-eight different shades of carpet stain. Let us review.
  • The Bears had a 21-7 lead over the Panthers with two minutes left in the first half and then played the last thirty-two minutes with their hands around their necks (which was not easy because their heads were up their asses at the time) and lost the game 31-24.
  • The Falcons led the Giants 20-10 halfway through the third quarter. Matty "Ice" and company would not score again and lost 30-20. (I think that nickname is actually starting to fit . . . just not the way it was originally intended).
  •  The Lions were at home and led the Bills 14-3 with two minutes left in the third quarter before losing 17-14. Oh yeah, the Bills quarterback was Kyle Orton. And oh yeah, the Lions are still a joke in the mellowed post Jim Schwartz era.
  • The Eagles led the Rams 34-7 with thirty seconds left in the third quarter. With 1:19 left in the game, the Rams had the ball at midfield down 34-28 after Austin Davis' 43 yard pass to Brian Quick. That was Davis' 97th NFL completion and Quick's 50th NFL catch so we're not exactly talking about Montana to Rice. The Eagles managed to hold-on for the win but blew the cover on the 6.5 point spread. Sons a bitches.
  • If not for the game below, the Saints-Bucs would have taken the cake as first the Saints gagged away a 13-0 first quarter lead before the Bucs gagged a 31-20 fourth quarter lead to eventually lose 37-31 in overtime. Fortunately for the FGR, the spread was 10.5 and I'm on an anti-Saints campaign until they start playing like a team that's at least half as good as they think they are. (Cut to another sideline shot of Rob Ryan playing the role of the worst coordinator in football).
  • And then we had the Browns at the Titans. Cleveland spotted the home team a 28-3 lead with 2:44 left to play in the first half. From that point forward it was 26-0 Cleveland on the strength of three Brian Hoyer touchdown passes, a safety and a Billy Cundiff field goal (and I can tell you from experience, if Billy Cundiff is beating you, it's not your day).
So that is the current NFL environment in which "experts" like myself are forced to pick games. With that being said, ground has been gained over the last few weeks and, with another Thursday night win, Mount .500 is no longer a speck in the distance . . . now it's more of a daunting summit towering over me, daring me, almost taunting me to climb it. (This is the Michael Jordan approach of convincing yourself that your opponent is disrespecting you so you'll be motivated to not just beat him but destroy him. Jordan was like a really angry Sun Tzu). One step at a time. Here we go.

Denver by 9.5 at N.Y. Jets: The Pick - Broncos

I know this is a trap game with a number that high but to cover, the Jets are going to have to score more than 14 points and I just can't see it . . . wait . . . nope, still can't see it.

Cleveland by 2 over Pittsburgh: The Pick - Browns

Forget the spread. One of these teams is going to win 13-10 and not even God knows or cares which one but what he and I do agree on is that there is no way these two teams are going to combine for 47 points. (Psssst . . . take the under). 

Tennessee by 4 over Jacksonville: The Pick - Jags

When I first wrote the lines down on Thursday, this number was 5.5 and then people started trying to concoct scenarios under which the Titans could beat anyone by almost a touchdown. Now it's down to just over a field goal and the scenarios are not much more plausible, even against the Jags. Yikes.

Atlanta by 3 over Chicago: The Pick - Falcons
This just never gets old.

I watched Top Gun for the 47th time the other night and one of my favorite underrated lines is when Viper gets chewed-out by the guy from the tower after Maverick buzzed him and made him do a spit take with his coffee. As he walks by Maverick and Goose, Viper says, "that just about covers the fly-bys" meaning that no more discussion on the topic is warranted. I think we can say the same about the Falcons and the Bears Super Bowl chances in the Matty "Ice" Ryan and "Smokin'" Jay Cutler eras. 

Green Bay by 3.5 at Miami: The Pick - Packers

I'm pretty much locked in on the Packers (and by the Packers, I mean Aaron Rodgers) unless they're more than a seven point favorite on the road against a decent team. The Dolphins' March to 8-8 begins in earnest now.

Detroit by 1.5 at Minnesota: The Pick - Vikings

I would love to make this a one word analysis but I can't figure-out a way to say, "the Lions suck" in one word. TheLionsSuck. Hey, I did it.

Cincinnati by 6.5 over Carolina: The Pick - Bengals

The Bengals probably thought they were hot shit after starting 3-0 and then they came off their bye week and got trounced by the un-killable zombies out of Boston. I still think they're pretty good and now they're pissed . . . or in Marvin Lewis' case, really darned perturbed you guys. 

New England by 3 at Buffalo: The Pick - Patriots
"Want to split some nachos or somethin'."

The Bills have had a nice run off of their new ownership's "WE'RE STAYING IN BUFFALO FOREVER" campaign. Unfortunately, the reality has now set-in for the players that, "we're staying in Buffalo forever."

Baltimore by 3 at Tampa: The Pick - Ravens

Ravens fans who've been through all of the ups and downs know that Joe Flacco and company are good for at least one manure spreading performance on the road (like last week against the Colts) but they rarely have those games back to back. It's going to be a long day for Mike Glennon. 

San Diego by 7 at Oakland: The Pick - Chargers

The Raiders are 0-4 with an average margin of defeat of 13 points per game. The Chargers are 4-1 and their four wins have come by an average of over 17 points. So I guess the number is 7 because this is a rivalry game?

Seattle by 8 over Dallas: The Pick - Seahawks

I had the Cowboys covering here until I remembered that they practically invented the art of convincing people to think that they're good before parking the car in the front lawn, traipsing through the flowerbed and then waking-up the neighbors because they went to the wrong house (not that that makes them bad people).

Arizona by 3.5 over Washington: The Pick - Redskins
"Go Jimmy from the
accounting department!"

I'm going with the Redskins here solely based on the theory that neither of the two guys the Cardinals would prefer to have at quarterback (Carson Palmer and Drew Stanton) will finish the game meaning that it's going to be close, ugly and barely watchable. 

Philadelphia by 3 over N.Y. Giants: The Pick - Giants

Always take the points in an NFC East game unless you have a very good reason not to like it involves Tony Romo trying to secure a playoff spot which is not the case here. 

San Francisco by 3.5 at St. Louis: The Pick - 49ers

So now everyone in the 49ers organization from the owner to the players can't stand Jim Harbaugh. It's funny how when you're so close to someone, it limits your ability to see who they really are, until it hits you in the face like a frying pan. The good thing for the Niners, however, is that they seem to be playing better as the hate meter rises into the red.

Last Week's Record: 8-6-1 . . . Season Record: 34-41-1. 

Email the Fantasy Golf Report at fgr@fantasygolfreport.com.

Thursday, October 9, 2014

The Week 6 Thursday Night NFL Pick

Indianapolis by 3 at Houston: The Pick - Colts

"GO YOU %#$*& NERD!!!"
After stumbling out of the gate (pun intended), the Colts have gotten their act together with blowout wins over the hapless Jags and Titans followed by a grinder over the Ravens. Meanwhile, the Texans have proven to be a feisty bunch by going 3-2 despite having Harvard's own Ryan Fitzpatrick at quarterback but their wins have come against the Raiders, Redskins and Bills (with E.J. Manual at quarterback) a/k/a the dregs of the NFL. This will be the first Thursday night game of the season where the losing team keeps the score within twenty, but not by much. Colts - 31 . . . Texans - 17.

Last Week's Record: 8-6-1 . . . Season Record: 34-41-1. (Thursday night record: 4-1).

Tuesday, October 7, 2014

Fantasy Golf: The 2014-15 PGA Tour Preview (sort of)

Since the next PGA Tour season technically starts on Thursday, I feel obligated to generate some kind of preview despite the fact that last season literally ended sixteen days ago. I'll be honest, when I look at the tour schedule page for the rest of 2014, I can't tell you with a whole lot of certainty which tournaments are legit and which ones are fluff.  I will assume that if you're starting your fantasy golf season now: (1) you are probably basing your league on FedEx Cup points which will be awarded from the Frys.com Open through the OHL Classic in November before they take a holiday break until the Hyundai Tournament of Champions and (2) you should probably be writing this post instead of me because you are clearly more invested at this point than I am. (Yeah right, a guest writer . . . good one).

I hereby nominate Dianna Agron to
play you know who's wife in the
movie. Just seems like a good fit.
The most valuable tool for evaluating the upcoming season is probably last season's regular season FedEx Cup standings before the playoff results started screwing with them. You then have to account for players who came on strong like Billy Horschel and Chris Kirk. And then you have to find a place for wild cards like Tiger, Dustin Johnson and Jason Dufner but, word to the wise, nothing will crush a fantasy golf squad like injuries, drugs, crazy chicks and, worst of all, complacency (right 2013 Bubba?).

So the way I'm going to handle this is to list my top thirty
based on how I see them finishing the 2015 regular season. Remember that it's tough to accumulate points when you play somewhere else so guys like Justin Rose, Adam Scott and Martin Kaymer are at a disadvantage. On the other hand, if you're playing lights-out, it doesn't really matter how many times you tee it up as Rory and Sergio proved. The number in parentheses is where they finished in 2013-14 FedEx Cup regular season points.

1. Rory McIlroy (1): The best player in the world. End of story.

2. Sergio Garcia (7): He's having fun and I expect a big year but do you want to root for him?

3. Jordan Spieth (8): Two seasons and a Ryder Cup under his belt. Now it's time to win more.

4. Matt Kuchar (4): Take him and relax. Picking Kuch is like buying a Subaru.

5. Adam Scott (14): No more Stevie Williams on the bag = no more inferiority complex.

6. Tiger Woods (218): Because this is where you go all-in with pocket tens.

7. Jimmy Walker (2): The Ryder Cup and three wins last season proved he's the real deal.

8. Dustin Johnson (6): Because this is where you go all-in with pocket eights.

9. Rickie Fowler (16): T5, T2, T2 and T3 in the 2014 majors . . . yes please.

10. Justin Rose (18): The U.S. Open hangover should be gone and a second major is imminent.

11. Billy Horschel (69): Playing as well as anyone on the planet (Earth that is).

12. Jim Furyk (5): He'll keep finding a way to threaten the top ten without winning.

13. Chris Kirk (10): He's a lock for the 10-15 spot. The Ryder Cup snub should be a motivator.

14. Henrik Stenson (70): Betting that 2014 was an anomaly and not the start of a tend.

15. Hideki Matsuyama (22): Great all-around game and took home the 2014 Memorial title.

16. Zach Johnson (11): Can't imagine him finishing much lower. God won't allow it.

17. Patrick Reed (9): He'll keep succeeding just to stick it in your face . . . bitch.

18. Keegan Bradley (23): Two year winless drought. He's due for at least one hot week.

19. Jason Dufner (57): Set to play later this month but neck injuries are scary . . . like spiders.

20. Brendon Todd (12): Great putters like Todd tend to lurk around the top 20.*

21. Jason Day (34): Was ready to re-enter the picture and then only played eleven times. Huh?

22. Cameron Tringale (61): My first of three breakthrough picks. Just has the look of a player.

23. Martin Kaymer (14): I could see him finishing in the top five or around fifty-five.

24. Ryan Moore (19): He's going to land around this spot and he's yours if you want him.

25. Ryan Palmer (30): Can bomb it and finally started showing signs of consistency.

26. Brooks Koepka (N/A): Breakthrough No. 2. Finished 12th in the All Around stat category.

27. Hunter Mahan (62): Prime candidate for another baby related slump. Waiting on more intel.

28. Bubba Watson (3): Could be another version of 2013. See above re: "complacency."

29. Phil Mickelson (45): Put some heat on himself at the Ryder Cup which is a good thing.

30. Russell Knox (48): Breakthrough No. 3. Gut feeling. He's from Scotland so he must be good.

So there you have it. We'll revisit this list before the Tournament of Champions when you should be starting your fantasy league anyway (kids today . . . harumph). In the meantime, we'll have the chance to gather a little data to load into the FGR super-computer as I try to keep a low profile while hanging onto the back of the Orioles' bandwagon. 

Footnote
But I am smiling.

* And in Todd's case, I do mean lurk. Let's hope his highly successful 2014 season gives him enough clout to upgrade that PGATour.com profile picture.

Email the Fantasy Golf Report at fgr@fantasygolfreport.com.

Sunday, October 5, 2014

Week 5 NFL Picks . . . O's-Tigers Game 2 Timeline

Let's take the opportunity that the NFL picks present to pump-out a quick timeline from what was an eventful Friday for the FGR because clearly I still have nothing insightful or useful to say in support of my football predictions. We'll preface this with a scene from my office on Thursday as I not so subtly broadcast that I was planning to take my kids to Game 2 of the Orioles-Tigers series but "I STILL DON'T HAVE TICKETS YET." Suffice it to say that four seats materialized, otherwise this would be a really boring story about me taking my kids to see The Boxtrolls.

Carolina by 2.5 over Chicago: The Pick - Bears

Friday at 9:00 a.m.: The FGW departs for the Jersey Shore on a girls weekend leaving me alone with the three FGK's and the Fantasy Golf Dog (the "FGD"). T-minus two hours until we head to Camden Yards and t-minus two hours and ten minutes until I start yelling at people "SETTLE DOWN BACK THERE!"

Tennessee by 1.5 over Cleveland: The Pick - Browns

11:57 a.m.: It takes half an hour to drive the last mile to our parking spot. Here are the three requirements to get a job directing traffic in Baltimore City: (1) You can blow a whistle; (2) Your natural look can be described as "disinterested"; and (3) You can lose a game of checkers in three moves or less because you have absolutely no fucking clue what you are doing.

Philadelphia by 6.5 over St. Louis: The Pick - Eagles

12:07 p.m.: We get to our seats just in time for the first pitch and the stadium is all orange. There appear to be only a couple hundred Tiger fans. Then again, Verlander is pitching so one of those fans is Kate Upton. Advantage: Push.

N.Y. Giants by 4 over Atlanta: The Pick - Falcons

OK, so maybe we bring
some of it on ourselves.
12:52 p.m.: No score, Verlander is dealing and BOOM, Nick Markakis just hit a two-run shot over the right field wall. That finally woke-up a crowd that was still hungover from last night's beatdown. Did I mention that the start time for this game was 12:07 p.m.? Because you know, that's the kind of national respect that Baltimore engenders. Whenever they do an overhead shot of one of our two magnificent stadiums and the nearby inner harbor, I half expect one of the announcers to say, "you know, there's probably a good chance we're filming a real live murder right now."

New Orleans by 10.5 over Tampa Bay: Bucs

1:15 p.m.: The Tigers turn it around and take the air out of the building with five runs in the top of the 4th. This is right about the time that everyone who was at last night's game looks at their fifth Bud Light and thinks, "man, I'm feeling a bit bloated." (Oh and I'm done picking the Saints until they freakin' show-up for the 2014 season. I don't care who or where they're playing).

Dallas by 6.5 over Houston: The Pick - Texans

1:38 p.m.: The O's scratch-out a run in the bottom of the fourth to remind everyone that it's a long game. Speaking of long games, at this point you may have noticed that the two teams have been playing for over 90 minutes and have only completed four innings which puts them on pace for a nine inning game that will take 3:23. Way to get your arms around that pace of play problem Bud Selig. To compound the problem, we have a Baltimore version of Peter Gammons and Thomas Boswell sitting behind us. Only if Gammons and Boswell were racists with triple digit vocabularies and a penchant for profanity. The highlight was when one called Miguel Cabrera something that rhymes with ducking slick. I guess he thought the three people sitting next to me were midgets. Stay classy Section 220, Row 4.

Detroit by 6.5 over Buffalo: The Pick - Lions

1:40 p.m.: We're between innings, my ass hurts and I'm about to doze-off on the burly chap sitting next to me. FGK3 (the most reliable of the bunch even though she's only seven years old) asks if we can go to the batting cage. Brilliant! I promise FGK1 that we can be back by the start of the 8th inning which, at the game's current pace, means we could probably squeeze in nine holes down the road at Carroll Park (extremely local reference . . . bring it).

Indianapolis by 3.5 over Baltimore: The Pick - Ravens

It's my team so I have to give this game some love and explain that I fully expect it to be the one where the Ravens fumble two kickoff returns, drop behind by 17 and then make a furious comeback only to fall 3 points short when they run out of time because John Harbaugh wasted a timeout challenging a play purely on moral grounds.

Thanks for coming Kate.
Don't let the door hit ya.
Pittsburgh by 6 at Jacksonville: The Pick - Steelers

1:57 p.m.: At some point while the kids were hitting wiffle balls, Verlander got pulled which means that Kate Upton probably left her seat and walked right passed us. So for the 2014 record, I was in Rome on the same night the Rolling Stones did an outdoor show at Circus Maximus and I was in Camden Yards at the same time as Kate Upton . . . and I missed them both because I wasn't paying attention! Son of a . . .

Denver by 7.5 over Arizona: The Pick - Broncos

2:47 p.m.: We return to our seats just in time to catch the end of a scoreless 7th inning so it's 5-3 heading into the top of the 8th. I would describe the crowd as being in an optimistic malaise. There is hope but not much evidence to support it. Especially when the Tigers add a run to make it 6-3.

San Francisco by by 5 over Kansas City: The Pick - Chiefs

3:01 p.m.: Enter the evidence to support hope in the form of Joba Chamberlain. Considering that Chamberlain was a major contributor to the O's scoring frenzy the night before and the home fans are cheering his entrance like Cal Ripken just hit a game winning grand slam with Eddie Murray, Frank Robinson and Brooks Robinson on base,* I'm guessing the Tigers have some bullpen issues. It's almost enough to make me feel sorry for Verlander. Almost.

San Diego by 6.5 over N.Y. Jets: The Pick - Chargers

3:07 p.m.: After getting the first batter out, it's Joba time as he promptly hits Adam Jones in the butt (at which point the fans boo?). Then Nelson Cruz and Steve Pearce single scoring Jones and setting the O's up with men at first and second and one out. Joba, we hardly knew ya'. Enter Joakim Soria who promptly walks J.J. Hardy to load the bases. Buck Showalter then pinch hits for light hitting Ryan Flaherty with Delmon Young who smokes the first pitch he sees down the left field line for a double. Then this happens. Bedlam.

Cincinnati by 1 at New England: The Pick - Bengals

3:14 p.m.: I was at the game when Maryland's Grevis Vasquez almost singlehandedly beat Duke in his last home game against them to help give the Terps a piece of the ACC title and that was the closest thing I've ever experienced to the euphoria that was now all around me. But that was made-up in large part of college kids who were passing through town to burn a couple coaches and flip a few cars on their way to bigger and better things. Orioles fans aren't just in it for life, it is their life. When the O's win, their fans feel like one of their kids just won and, when they win a game like this, they feel like one of their kids just won an Olympic gold medal. I would never disrespect a true O's fan by saying that I am one of them because I am not. I was late to the party as a mid-twenties transplant so I just married into the family of the gold medal winner but that's still pretty cool.

Seattle by 7 at Washington: The Pick - Seahawks

3:41 p.m.: When Eugenio Suarez grounds out to end the game,** there is one more outburst from the crowd (louder than the Joba Chamberlain reaction but not by much). And then no one leaves. And I mean no one. It's not for a long time, maybe a minute or two but everyone just stands there taking a moment to reflect on what had just happened. It's the kind of game you can't wait to get home and tell your kids about unless they were there with you . . . which just makes it that much sweeter.

Footnotes
Grown Ups 2?!? What does
that piece of crap have to do
with . . . oh, never mind.

* I know this never would have been possible seam heads because some of those careers did not overlap. Just work with me people.

** Total time to play an eight and a half inning baseball game . . . three hours and forty-one minutes. That would have made it the seventh longest American movie ever made, just behind Gone with the Wind at three hours and forty-six minutes and two hours longer than Grown Ups 2.

Last Week's Record: 8-5 . . . Season Record: 26-35. 

Email the Fantasy Golf Report at fgr@fantasygolfreport.com.