Tuesday, April 24, 2018

Fantasy Golf: The Zurich Classic Preview

Unless I'm missing something, DraftKings has decided not to run a game for the Zurich Classic which can only mean one of two things: (1) They were two lazy to devise a game to fit this week's two-man format; or (2) They needed to slow their money printing machine down for a few days to add more green ink. Either way, it doesn't leave us much reason to watch golf this weekend other than maybe for the pure enjoyment of it but seriously, who does that anymore?

And it figures that it would happen just when I showed signs of getting on a roll. Last week I recommended Trey Mullinax (T2) and Jimmy Walker (4th) for chrissakes. For good measure I threw-in Billy Horschel (T11), Aaron Baddeley (T16) and Keith Mitchell (T26). If Charley Hoffman had showed-up and Kevin Tway hadn't tripped over a bunker rake with a 74 on Sunday, I might have made enough money to buy the FGW that smiling robotic husband she's had her eye on that actually exchanges audible pleasantries instead of communicating through a series of grunts, groans and farts. (What can I say? I'm just a caveman).

I Googled "Cajun Sexy" and
frankly it got kinda weird so
I just went with Mila Kunis.
Well just because DraftKings is taking the week-off doesn't mean the Fantasy Golf Report will. Especially since I had already done most of the legwork on the stupid chart below before I figured-out that there was no real gambling opportunity. Not that having something to wager on would have made the research any more valuable because all the elaborate statistical data really tells us is how much players hate teeing it up at the TPC Louisiana. Until they changed the format, the place had fewer repeat customers than a Pittsburgh library. Of all the guys you would consider picking this week, only Billy Horschel, Brian Stuard, Chris Stroud and Justin Rose have played the past five years and they've each missed the cut twice which is odd for guys who theoretically like the golf course.

So who should you pick to win a tournament played on a shit course with a tricked-up format? Well you don't want to waste a stud like Justin Thomas, Jordan Spieth or Jon Rahm with that many variables in play. The good news is that you don't have to because you get the same credit for picking one of their partners which means you should consider Bud Cauley, Ryan Palmer or Wesley Bryan. And based on the "Pick the Lesser of the Pair" Theory, you should also consider Ryan Ruffels (Jason Day), Marc Tunesa (Brooks Koepka) or Chris Paisley (Tommy Fleetwood). 

I'm going with Bud Cauley because (a) he and Justin Thomas have both had some success here including a tie for 5th as teammates last year, and (b) J.T. is sick of not winning since February so he's going to unleash a bit of whoop-ass. My second choice would be Ryan Palmer followed by either member of the Jimmy Walker-Sean O'Hair tandem who lit it up in San Antonio. We'll see you next week with a little more enthusiasm (a low bar to clear).   

                                      ODE TO THE TPC LOUISIANA   


2017
2016
2015
2014
2013
Billy Horschel
MC
T36
T48
MC
1st
Brian Stuard
T11
1st
T64
MC
MC
Brooks Koepka
T5
DNP
DNP
T21
DNP
Bubba Watson
T5
DNP
DNP
DNP
T15
Bud Cauley
T5
DNP
DNP
T11
DNP
Byeong Hun An
MC
T2
DNP
DNP
DNP
Cameron Smith
1st
DNP
T43
DNP
DNP
Charley Hoffman
T5
T11
DNP
T5
MC
Chesson Hadley
DNP
T20
T8
DNP
DNP
Chris Kirk
MC
T5
DNP
DNP
T21
Chris Stroud
T11
T20
T22
MC
MC
Daniel Berger
MC
T20
T6
DNP
DNP
Gary Woodland
MC
T20
DNP
DNP
64th
J.B. Holmes
T5
DNP
DNP
T11
DNP
Jamie Lovemark
MC
T2
DNP
MC
DNP
Jason Day
MC
T5
T4
DNP
DNP
Jason Dufner
T5
DNP
DNP
DNP
T42
Jimmy Walker
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
T8
Jonas Blixt
1st
T72
MC
DNP
70th
Jordan Spieth
4th
DNP
DNP
DNP
MC
Justin Rose
MC
MC
1st
T8
T15
Justin Thomas
T5
DNP
T12
DNP
DNP
Kevin Kisner
2nd
DNP
T28
T34
DNP
Nick Watney
T5
DNP
MC
T75
T15
Patrick Cantlay
T14
DNP
DNP
DNP
DNP
Patrick Reed
T14
DNP
DNP
MC
MC
Patton Kizzire
T5
T8
DNP
DNP
DNP
Ryan Palmer
4th
DNP
DNP
MC
T32
Scott Brown
2nd
DNP
T36
DNP
T42
Sean O'Hair
DNP
MC
T12
T52
T47

Email the Fantasy Golf Report at fgr@fantasygolfreport.com
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