|"Funny you should ask Hatch. I really|
have no idea what I'm doing in a POW
camp. I think I'm supposed to be British."
The only people less interested in Sunday's game than Ravens fans and 49er fans are Jets fans who must be looking at this match-up as the 1980 Russian hockey team versus the German national soccer team from Victory. (I'm sorry if that offends Germans but you shouldn't have paid-off the refs and you shouldn't have roughed-up Pelé. That's like hiring Jeff Gillooly to take out Tim Tebow. Uncool man). So let's put off the Super Bowl pick for a bit and spend one more session on Dr. Melfi's couch telling her about the ducks in the pool.
|Oh my God. We're becoming the Bills!|
On Wednesday, the Colts hired Ravens' defensive coordinator, Chuck Pagano. Apparently the first five times they called, the Ravens' receptionist said, "I'm sorry he's not in the building but Cam Cameron's available and, by available, I mean REALLY available." The Ravens returned the favor by hiring Jim Caldwell as their new quarterbacks coach which will lead to the first ever coach/player relationship where the two sides communicate only by blinking Morse code at each other.
"That's him. That's the Terp.
He fouled Plumlee. We saw him!"
On Thursday, Prince Fielder signed with the Tigers instead of the Orioles which was not unexpected unless you're one of the 17 delusional O's fans who still reads the Baltimore Sun for anything more than high school scores, horse racing schedules and the lunch specials at Night Shift. Ultimately, this was just another case of Alec Baldwin telling Baltimore, "This is the best free agent. This is Prince Fielder and to you he is gold, and you won't get him. Why? Because to give him to you would be throwing him away. He plays for winners." The next day, Brooks Robinson fell off a stage and broke his shoulder which can't be a good omen. (I did not make that up. Who puts old men in chairs on a stage? Why not just put them on giant unicycles?)
|"Great. That's all I need. Another |
year of third and long draw plays."
The Super Bowl Pick
I can't find any reason to pick the Patriots to win this game. The one position where they are deemed to have the biggest advantage is quarterback and I'm not even sure that's true, especially when you factor in the Giants' advantage at receiver (and yes, I'll take Nicks, Cruz and Manningham over Hernandez, Welker and a gimpy Gronkowski). The defenses and the running games are mismatches in favor of the Giants. The only way the Patriots win is if Brady goes for over 300 yards and 3+ touchdowns but the problem with that recipe is that the Ravens just proved that he can be shut down and the Giants just stymied a better passing attack in Green Bay. What am I missing? Special teams? Belichick over Coughlin? The revenge factor from 2007? That's all media driven subterfuge and I'm not buying it. I like the Giants big and in the process Eli becomes the second quarterback in two weeks to make me look like a jackass (like I need the help).
Giants - 31, Patriots - 17
Playoff Record: 6-4